Patrick had seen the new girl aswell and had the same "observations" I had. We ended up talking about girls in general and Patrick kept going on and on about how he wanted a girlfriend. I didn't really see the point back then, as far as I was concerned they couldn't do anything for me, they didn't like the same things I did, and most of them thought I was weird.
"Alright listen, if I got a girlfriend people would stop treating me like such an ass all the time you know? I don't want to be "that guy" but-"
"Either of you boys want to buy a school newspaper?"
It was her, and as soon as I saw her it happened again. Everything went colorless, the entire cafeteria went completely still. I could feel her soft warm skin, her supple lips, her soft hair, everything around me became part of me, and I became everything around me. And just as fast as it came it was gone.
"Well do you want one or not?" she said with a smile.
"Uhh, yeah... Of course!" I laughed stupidly and handed her a crinkled up dollar bill
"Thanks a lot!" she said as she walked away.
"Bye, I mean, see you... later!" and forced a weak smile.
"Dude that was pathetic" Patrick chimed in with a laugh
"Shut-up!" I moaned and hit him in the arm.
I thought about her non stop from that moment in lunch until I fell asleep that night. I thought about what she was doing, what she was wearing, where she was, how she was, and for that matter, who she was! I still had no idea what her name was but I think at that point in time I would have taken a bullet for her. That night while I was thinking about her was the first time my meditation had ever brought me anything truly useful, in the form of a blessing and a curse.
No comments:
Post a Comment